The IGNITE Peak Performance Blog
If you’re here, you’re probably looking to make meaningful and lasting change in your life. As a professional coach who specializes in working with women and mothers, I can help you.
The best way for us to get to know each other is for you to contact me! You can also sign up for my monthly newsletter below. In the meantime, keep an eye on this page for monthly blogs containing research-based tips, reading recommendations, and other resources that can help you IGNITE to reach your goals!
No “Right Way” to be a Woman
“As I have written before, gendered messages are like the air we breathe– invisible and yet we are taking them in all the time. It is inevitable that we lose our way as we (often unconsciously) strive to be “good” women. Yet there is no right path for all of us. We need to blaze our own trails and live our lives congruent with our own values.”
Identifying Toxic Positivity
“Social media is saturated with saccharine sweet posts telling you to “look on the bright side”. Of course, it’s helpful to be reminded to appreciate the little things in life. It’s healthy to be reminded that there are also good things amongst the bad or to take a deep breath to help you shift your perspective. And there are also true, scientifically-demonstrated benefits to a regular gratitude practice. The line between effective, healthy gratitude and toxic positivity is often blurry at best. So, what’s the difference?”
Coping With Uncertainty
“In the collective unknowing and changing ideas of what ‘normal’ is, there has been an increase in adverse mental health conditions in the United States. From 2019 to 2020, the CDC collected community-level data that demonstrated that the prevalence of depressive disorders increased by four times from 2019 to 2020 and anxiety disorder by three times over the same period. It also reported elevated substance use and trauma- and stressor-related disorders. Given this, what can we possibly do to help ourselves and each other?”
Career Planning For the Empty Nest
“When moms make decisions about our careers, we are rarely (if ever) just thinking about ourselves. We are often the primary caretakers of our kids, so if we’re pursuing a career, we have to think about how we will be able to meet the needs of our families at the same time. Some moms decide to stay home full time and opt out of work. Others may “opt in between” by choosing a career that fits with their children’s schedules, even if it is not their first choice of career. Some may work part-time instead of full time. And, of course, plenty of moms work full time outside of the home. Regardless, moms often modify their careers in some way. There is no one right path for all of us.”
The Golden Rule and YOU!
“Research suggests it’s likely you would feel compassion toward a friend who is struggling. Yet you might not extend that same kindness to yourself. Often we hold a high bar for ourselves and, when we don’t meet our own expectations, we can become very critical of ourselves. Rather than thinking “I made a mistake,” we can quickly think, “I am a complete loser.” We extend the Golden Rule to others but not to ourselves.”
Deconstructing Gendered Messages
“Even though we cannot control the gendered messages our children receive, we do have the power to talk with them about how to notice and to think critically about these messages. By being proactive, we have the power to influence the impact of these messages. Take a look at this great resource for some tips about what you can do to counter gender stereotypes!”
Coping With Regret
“In my experience, mothers often forget to pay attention to both understanding and working toward their “ideal” selves as they focus on caring for others. As the years pass, and especially as our children grow up and leave to start their own lives, we begin to regret not spending enough time investing in our ideal selves. Somehow we forgot about the non-mom part of who we are while we were helping our kids discover who they are.”
Find Your Passion or Grow It?
“If your college student sees their college journey as a race to find their “thing” and then to commit to it indefinitely–you might want to talk with them about this notion. Very recently, I’ve written about the importance of allowing young athletes to explore a variety of different sports and interests, as this supports healthy identity development. The same principle applies to our “big kids” heading off to college. College kids benefit from exploring new ideas before committing to a major and potentially, a career. Yet there is a tremendous push for them to find their pre-existing passion and commit to it.”
Comparisons as a Source of Connection
“With the rise of social media, we have a limitless number of options to compare ourselves with other people! That can be a big problem. For example, researchers in 2014 determined that more social media use, especially on Facebook, is correlated with lower self-esteem. The impact of upward social comparisons, looking at others and thinking they are happier or healthier than we are, was related to lower self-esteem and self-evaluations. But comparisons are not always a bad thing; they can actually help us sometimes! When we do compare ourselves to others, how might we do it in a way that is constructive and conducive to growth? “
Identity Development & Youth Sports
“In the long run, if your child specializes in sports too early in life, they may not be able to fully explore their different interests, which could cause difficulties finding a fulfilling career path later in life. It’s essential that kids of all ages engage in the developmental tasks necessary for career exploration. So, what can sports moms do?”